Why Do I Keep Getting Hurt In Relationships?
![Why do I keep getting hurt in relationships?](https://buyera.xyz/img/why-do-i-keep-getting-hurt-in-relationships_0tk.jpg)
Conditions: they are so complicated! Full of joy, fear, hope, pain, nostalgia, hatred… They are intense and very nuanced. But we do not always know how to choose them correctly. In fact, we all know one person who always gets hurt in relationships, one relationship disaster after another.
Disasters happen because they cannot identify who deserves their trust. They confuse them with people who have not earned anything. Self-centered people who think of themselves, just to think of themselves one more time.
The ratio fluctuates, constantly going up and down. Until one day you wake up like a broken toy , ruined by your own inability to get out of this cycle you’ve somehow gotten yourself into.
To be hurt in relationships
We learn from experience. If we touched something once and burned ourselves, we will not touch it again. Well, maybe not always – there are some people who will. Some people feel the need to double check that their sensations are correct … And of course they burn themselves again.
And it often comes out of their big heart that wants to give people one option after another. But then they get hurt, exactly where they were in the beginning.
But imagine not being like that. Imagine for a second you were transposed into the karmic driven world of Earl. Unfortunately, this can put you on the other extreme and make you distrust everything around you. You start wearing thick, heat-repellent gloves. You end up going through life with a shield.
People like this can coexist with others, but they always do so nervously and superficially. The gloves they wear keep them from receiving the warmth that others provide. But the warmth of love is good for us.
What happens then? Well, two things can happen. One is that we get used to the gloves and no longer take them off and therefore give up the warmth of love forever. Two, we do not get used to them and begin to feel that we have to take them off.
This desire will act as a strong feeling. When we hold it in or compress it too much, trying to prevent its energy from affecting us, it becomes a time bomb. One that will go off when we least expect it.
Thus, a person with great anxiety about taking off these protective gloves will end up doing it impulsively. In the end, they do not think about how hot the object they are touching is.
What can I do to stop being hurt in relationships?
Open the rest of your senses. Observe how this person treats others. Someone who gossips about others behind your back will end up doing it to you. Someone who does not consider the feelings of others will not consider yours either. Anyone who is used to lying to protect himself will also lie to us . Anyone who sees others as tools to use will also put us in their toolbox if we let them. It is this behavior that results in us being hurt in relationships.
The point is to learn about them, in addition to what you see on social media or in their speech. It’s about understanding them as a whole and seeing how the pieces of those we have put together fit together.
The important thing is not to settle for the piece they have designed and delivered to us. We must try to outline it ourselves and decide if we like it, if we want it to be a part of our lives.
![A man with a hidden face can cause you to be hurt in relationships](https://buyera.xyz/img/why-do-i-keep-getting-hurt-in-relationships_15b.jpg)
Before we let someone into our lives, it would be a good idea to get to know their history. To know at least a good part of their lives. How have they coped with challenges in life, what challenges have they chosen for themselves, what are their dreams for the future, and what would they be willing to do for them?
Some people burn us
They will, no matter how much we believe in human goodness. Whether it is due to their situation or their genetics, some people have an enormous destructive ability. And unfortunately, some of them are experts at hiding it. They know the story of the frog. The one who came down in a pot of cold water and did not realize in time that the water temperature was rising and that he would be boiled.
Many people project the feeling of being in “cold water”, and once they have gained confidence, they raise the temperature. So they start burning us, almost without us realizing it. So when we decide to get out… We have many times already been injured.
So we need to be aware that people are constantly changing, just like the world around us. The point is not to be paranoid and constantly be suspicious of your relationship, but it’s a good idea to keep an eye on it so you can identify the changes, no matter how gradual they may be, do not let them go unnoticed.