Relationship Addicts: Emotional Addiction

Amorous disease is genuine and its victims can be counted in the thousands. Relationship addicts push their self-esteem and dignity aside every day.  They do so in exchange for toxic and destructive conditions. These people are characterized by marked emotional immaturity that can quickly turn into something bitter and harmful.

Relationships never create healthy, happy relationships; they find themselves in hostage situations. In their daily lives, these couples get caught up in a cycle of pain where they constantly sacrifice their values, morals, emotions and principles.

Therefore, as with most addictions, it is not easy to stop a habit driven by a wild need: the need to be a part of someone, to lay oneself at their feet, and to feel perfected, strengthened, successful. As the brain gets used to this dynamic, the “toxic love” becomes a toxin. It will be very difficult to break this cycle.

How to identify relationship addicts

Relationships are just like any other. They have careers, interests, passions, passions, virtues and shortcomings. There is one simple point we would like to make: Love addiction does not discriminate on the basis of age or status.

It can occur in any of us without us noticing it. Without us realizing it, our current relationship may have distinct addiction-like sides.

Now, if we dive into what creates our romantic relationship, then we might notice a few things. First, there are two types of relationship addicts. The first describes those who always need to have a boyfriend.

The thoughts of these people can be summed up: “you do not fall in love with someone you love, but with someone you can love. The most important thing is to love someone, to have someone. ”

The second kind of relationship addict behaves like a bear trap. The moment they enter into a relationship, they get stuck in it. They cannot leave it, even if it is harmful, even if it goes against their fundamental dignity.

Therefore  , they share two types of character traits: fear of loneliness, lack of clear identity, lack of self-esteem  and a constant search for affection and affirmation from others. They both lead to extreme behavior to save the relationship no matter what. Furthermore, they become enormously anxious if it seems that not everything is perfect.

All of these symptoms exhibited by relationship addicts have almost the same patterns as the symptoms of drug addiction. The brain needs this dose of compulsive attachment, this “food” our partner gives us, even in an unfaithful, toxic relationship.

In this way, little by little, we end up unable to control our own behavior. It can even reach extremes: anxiety attacks, eating disorders, suicide attempts…

What can relationship addicts do to break the pattern?

It is difficult to quit smoking if you continue to smoke the cigarette. Likewise, it is difficult to leave an addictive relationship if we stick to the same ideas. This emotional nicotine destroys our love for ourselves.

Some go to therapy and complain that they always fall in love with the wrong, most “painful” people. It is as if their brains are programmed to fall into the same toxic traps. They do not learn from the past and from their bad experiences.

Instead, they find themselves in the same situation over and over again. Why is this happening? Why is it so difficult for addicts to stop this behavior?

Basically, it’s because they still have not learned the consequences of this emotional addiction. Because they are vulnerable, with poor self-esteem and a need for love, even if it is bad for them. They still need to solve some basic problems by themselves. Here are some of these issues.

How to face your emotional addiction:

• It is crucial to recognize one’s own relationship dependence and its consequences. Be honest with yourself and admit it when everything is not okay. Open your eyes and accept reality.
• You need to understand that the emotional and physical pillar in all relationships is respect and self-esteem. Without the two, we do not deserve to love or to be loved. This is because when we do not respect anything, it goes to pieces and breaks.

• Similarly, there is another basic aspect to understand. Emotional addiction can manifest itself as a neurotic need. A need to have someone by our side regardless of the price or whoever it may hurt. Extreme addiction destroys us. It destroys our potential.
• Often, we treat our desires as needed. Behind the phrase “I want to be loved” we hide other desires that we should explore and understand. If we feel the need for recognition, validation, or protection against loneliness at all costs, we do not need to find a hostage to cross those fields off. We need to be the one to take care of these issues first.

Make the decision

Relationships addicts have to take the plunge and ask themselves one simple question. That question is: Do I want love that hurts, or emotional health? If they choose the latter option, there is only one path to take. It immediately seems simple, but it requires a lot of personal work.

That path involves working on one’s self-esteem and building a stronger, more courageous pride – one that will set you free and help you build deep connections. Instead of hostages, there will be free people who choose to build something together.